December 2, 2017

Kissing Your Sister


From my high school classmate and dear friend, Tom, the retired Georgia homicide dick:

The Nun and The Cabbie
A cabbie picks up a Nun......She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her.

She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: 'I have a question to ask you, but I don't want to offend you.'

She answers, 'My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.'

'Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.'

She responds, 'Well, let's see what we can do about that:

#1- you have to be single, and
#2 you must be Catholic.'

The cab driver is very excited and says, 'Yes, I'm single and Catholic!'

'OK' the nun says. 'Pull into the next alley.'

The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

'My dear child,' says the nun, 'why are you crying?'

'Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.'

The nun says, 'That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.'

November 8, 2017

What [The F**k] Happened!


A year ago today, folks started going to the polls to vote for Donald Trump or the shoo-in, Hillary Clinton. I mean everyone knew that Clinton was going to be the next prez and the FIRST woman POTUS in the history of the Newnited Snakes! foregone conclusion, right? Well, let's revisit that schadenfreude-laden day, shall we?


Wow! I mean, doncha just love that old goat, Bob Schieffer? Here's him today:


More to come..

November 5, 2017

A Roaring Fourth? Hardly!

So it seems that this past Saturday, the Antifa scum wanted to raise the roof, throw a hissy fit, and engage in other dastardly acts to overthrow "The Trump/Pence regime" whatever the cost. But the big push seems to have fizzled out! Below is some Newsweak coverage on the thin turnouts. (No link, you google it.) But somehow it seems that the MSM seeks to turn it against the alt-right and ordinary citizens (see emphasis below) who really didn't give a fricasseed crap about what these cockroaches were up to.


The afternoon of November 4 arrived in midtown Manhattan like any other Saturday. Families breezed in and out of shops and restaurants along Fifth Avenue. Couples chatted on benches in Central Park, enjoying the crisp autumn air. You could easily be forgiven for not knowing that a protest billed Friday by Fox News as the “Antifa Apocalypse” was gathering on the south side of Times Square.

The so-called November 4 protests, which took place in cities across the country today, hosted by a nascent protest group called Refuse Fascism, will likely be remembered more for what they did not look like, than what they did. Far-right conspiracies had morphed the event into a fantasy world of unrealistic expectations. Antifa was going to start a civil war. Antifa-bred supersoldiers were going to behead white people in town squares across the country. These stories were pushed hard by far-right outlets like Alex Jones’ Info Wars and Gateway Pundit, feeding an engine of clickbait to build a mind-blowing but utterly meaningless news story almost entirely out of thin air.

A-f**king-stounding! Is it just me or is the author is engaging in some butt-hurt here.

Party on, Wayne!

November 2, 2017

Classic traffic Stop Meltdown

Is there a problem, officer?


..but, but, but she's driving a Prius!

TANGENTIAL, O.T., NON SEQUITUR

October 29, 2017

Sunday Night Stolen From Odie Post

Obligatory and self-explanatory. Per Woodsterman, The following is a true bit of Scottish Diplomacy:


One thing about blokes from Scotland is that their hearts and humour are always in the right place!

Jimmy MacDonald, a City Councillor from Glasgow, was asked on a local live radio talk show, just what he thought about the allegations of torture of suspected terrorists.

His reply prompted his ejection from the studio, but to thunderous applause from the audience. His statement:

'If hooking up one rag head terrorist's testicles to a car battery gets the truth out of the lying little camel shagger to save just one Scottish soldiers life, then I have only three things to say, Red is positive, Black is negative, and make sure his nuts are wet.'

Exile on Main Street

I hear where Roger Stone got banned from Twitter the other day and is threatening to sue:


It comes when, coincidentally, I got banned from The Gateway Pundit because of this post:


It was about how Melania Trump was speaking to a group about the perils and tragedy of opioid addiction and, in the midst of her lovely speech, she sympathetically bussed a lady who was a repentant abuser. My comment was meant to express my desire to get a smooch from our lovely First Lady and volunteered to meet her at LAX with a couple of bottles of Vicodin to prove that I no longer used that pain killer and was, therefore, eligible for a smooch. So, the meaning was obviously misconstrued by Jim Hoft (the site owner) and I was tossed out with the rest of the troll garbage and spam ads.

My first reaction was indignation at this insult but, after calming down, I wrote an email to Jim explaining my meaning, emphasizing my respect for Melania and Donald Trump, and apologizing for any offense -- unintended or otherwise -- that he might have perceived. I clearly mentioned that I would not pout and take my exile like a man should reconsideration not be the order of the day. Further, I mentioned that I thanked him for his efforts at GWP and appreciated the work he did during the election.

At this writing, I have received no response and believe that they just push the "kill button" consigning you to the memory hole. But, to tell the truth, I am experiencing an episode of sour grapes now. I mean, the site -- once a truly good and exciting source of the latest news -- has fallen into the money-generation paradigm and is rife with ads that stifle the site's loading and operation. Further, without the skillful application of Ad Blocker and Ghostery, one can barely make out the content of the posts by their various authors for the pictures of click-bait ads and even the annoying auto-start videos. Add to the mix the fact that GWP also spawns other tabs in your browser for questionable sites.


With all this crass over-commercialization, maybe a lawsuit is in order for GWP. I mean, if Roger Stone is offended, surely..

In the past, Jim's better items are/were when he would actually do some analysis and post statistics or studies showing Hillary's scant campaign attendance was versus Trump's or how much the economy has improved since Trump took office or how much Trump has pared off the deficit and so on. But nowadays the posts are these jagged, literately cacophonous and incoherent tweets, textual fragments, and other detritus that hardly amplify or support the often-clickbaity headlines. They have devolved into nothing more than gossipy tidbits devoid of meat or nourishment. Alas, Gateway Pundit has become internet fast food. And, besides, who wants to hang around a site where the owner spasmodically offs faithful followers and commenters? I thought that shit was over with LGF and Ace of Spades.

So, rather than subject myself to the memories, I will go the way I did when I left Hot Air. I will revisit the sites where folks are less concerned with earning a nickel from every page view or click and more concerned on making a cohesive or truly humorous observation about the disintegrating left and the draining swamp.

..and, besides, those grapes hanging from the branch were most likely sour anyway!




October 26, 2017

The Creature from the Green Latrine

..marking time at the border this weekend!









..that's it for tonight! Note to Woodsterman: Help yourself, old son!

October 23, 2017

Murderer's Row

Some memes and pictures submitted by commenters on other blogs are absolutely priceless. Here is one such of these. And, no, it does not need explanation.


..but..by way of background, there is a post over on Gateway Pundit that merits you attention. It's the smarmy interview of George Clooney and Matt Damon; a tell-all about how they knew Weinstein was groping and and sleeping his way through the dewy-eyed ingenues who sought fame in Hollywood.


The post is here. They are basically doing this because Clooney's got a movie coming out and Damon's starring in it.

..imagine that!


ADD CROCK OF SHIT NEWS
This is a crock. it is also a schadenfreude-laden moment as these buttwipes begin eating their own. Over on the Fox website:
The 56-year-old actor spoke to reporters at the premiere of “Suburbicon,” which he directed, and said he hopes the sexual assault and harassment stories being told by women in the entertainment industry will lead to change, according to The Hollywood Reporter.

"What we hope is this is a watershed moment for society where women feel safe enough to talk about this issue, feel believed and where men who are committing these crimes [and] violations don't feel safe and feel as if they do these things they're going to be outed, sued and may even get litigated and go to jail for it," Clooney said.

"If we can get to that point then we actually succeeded. This thing won't end up just being Harvey Weinstein jokes in three months,” he added.

Clooney also said it was a “stupid thing” for Woody Allen to say it was important for the public to avoid a “witch hunt atmosphere” following dozens of sexual allegations against Weinstein. Allen told the BBC that the allegations against Weinstein are “very sad for everybody involved,” but cautioned the public to avoid a “witch hunt atmosphere” where "every guy in an office who winks at a woman is suddenly having to call a lawyer to defend himself.”
And there's more! Seems Weinstein is leaving his $2,000-per-day rehab program in Arizona after just one week!


Must have cut his dick off and pronounced him cured!

Someone please pass the vomit bag!

October 19, 2017

Out of my Stomach

Recently:


What a dickwad! After eight years of keeping silent, he's gone over to the other side.


My reaction pretty much says it all..

October 18, 2017

Off My Chest

From January 2009 until January 2017 (that's eight years to those of you in Rio Lindo), I have held my tongue to a great degree while that ass-hat Obama and his Democrat and Leftist cronies ravaged, debased, reviled, and otherwise ran this country into the muck and mire. Now that Obama and his stevedore-armed wookie soul mate have departed form the scene, we are left with the residue of his administration and adherents in the form of the Deep State, the DNC, GOPe, and other cockroaches who try to sully the intentions of the current president and generally try to discredit the president's followers as racists, fascists, members of the KKK, etc.

So, I am guessing that civility is not in their marching orders (as we have seen from the ugly speech-suppressing protests and violence. So long as that is the case, I see no reason to hold a civil tongue in my head. Consequently, here are all of the nicknames I may have passed up on when describing Obama. And, before you throw your card, please note that I am attributing these sobriquets and appellations to ONLY Barak Obama and his wife. They do not apply -- in my realm -- specifically to others OF ANY RACE.


Ace Of Spades, African't, Africoon, Afro, Americoon, Ape, Baboomba, Baboon, Banjo Lips, Billy Reuben, Bingo-Bongo, Biscuit Lip, Black Magic, Blood, BLT, Blue Gums, Bo-Bo, Bobblehead, Boon, Bootlip, Boy, Branch Manager (Monkeys climb trees), Brillo Pad, Bubba, Buckwheat, Bumper Lips, Burr Head, Bush-Boogie, Camel Lips, Chain Dragger, Chango, Charcoal Briquette, Chicago Navajo, Chicken Bandit, Chocolate Drop, Cliff Ape, Cocoa Puff, Coconut, Cocoon, Coon, Congo Lip, Cotton Ball, Chinless Yard Ape, Cotton-Picker, Curb-Biter, Darkie, Dawg, Defendant, Deuce, Ding Dong, Donkey Kong, Fat Albert, Field Nigger, Ghetto Monkey, Gorilla, Groid, Guttermonkey, Hambone, HNIC, Horse-Gums, House Nigger, Jambo, Jig, Jigaboo, Kaffir, King Putt, Knee Grow, Knuckle-, ragger, Porch Monkey, Lawn Jockey, Leprecoon, Leroy, Little (Black) Sambo, Liverlips, Magila , orilla, Maroon, McNigga, Midnight, Mississippi Blue Lip, Monkey, Monkeyboy, Mr. Bojangles, Mud Duck, Mud Flaps, Mud People, Mud Turtle, Mufasa, Muffin-head, Mulunyan, Munt, N'er, Naca, NAGA, Nagur, NAHA, Nanner, NAPA, Nappy Head, Nappy-headed Ho, Neekeri/Nekru, Negative, Negress, Negro, Negroid, Nelly, NFT, Ni-ni, Niche, Nig-nog, Niggabyte, Niggapotomous, Nigger, Nigger mortis, Niggerachi, Niggerette, Niggerino, Niggeroid, Nigglet, Nightcrawler, Niglige, Nigloo, Nignorant, Nigonometry, Nigra, Nigress, Niknok, Nineteens (19's), Ninja, Nitch, Nog, NOLA, Nonswimmer, Nooc, November, Nubian Princess, Number 2, Nurple, O.J., O.T.W., Oar , uggers, OBG, Oil Slick, Old Brown Tucker, Omarosa, Orb, Oreo, Plow Jockey, Porch Monkey, Primate, Pube Head, Puddle Duck, Roach, Rockfish, Rope-Head, Rope-Straightener, Rufus, Schwarzenigger, Shadow-Smurf, Shit-Slinger, Shitheel, Simian, Spear-Chucker, Splib, Spook, Stepan Fetchit, Stovelid, Stovepipe, Swamp Donkey, Swamp-Runner, Swamper, Tagger, Tar Baby, Missing Link, Toilet Swimmer, Token, Tree Hockey, Tree-Swinger, Tyrone, Uncle Ben, Uncle Tom, Unemployus Africanus, Velcro-head, Welfare Monkey, Whale Turd, Wog, Wool Head, Yard Ape, Zulu..

The list is not done; will return with more.

October 17, 2017

"An Open Letter to the NFL and its Players"

My former Squadron Deputy Commander sent me this on the matter of the faggoty NFL kneebenders. It is reproduced verbatim. Not for the faint of heart.

To the NFL and its players,

If I have brain cancer, I don’t ask my dentist what I should do. If my car has a problem, I don’t seek help from a plumber! Why do you think the public cares what a football player thinks about politics? If we want to know about football, then depending on the information we seek, we might consult with you, but even a quarterback doesn’t seek advice on playing his position from a defensive tackle!

You seem to have this over inflated view of yourselves, thinking because you enjoy working on such a large scale stage, that somehow your opinion about everything matters. The NFL realizes the importance of its “image” so it has rules that specify the clothes and insignia you can wear, the language you use, and your “antics” after a touchdown or other “great” play. But somehow you and your employer don’t seem to care that you disgrace the entire nation and its 320 million people in the eyes of the world by publicly disrespecting this country, its flag, and its anthem! The taxpaying citizens of this country subsidize your plush work environments, yet you choose to use those venues to openly offend those very citizens.

Do you even understand what the flag of this country means to so many of its citizens before you choose to “take a knee” in protest of this “country" during our national anthem?

You may think because you are paid so much that your job is tough, but you are clueless when it comes to tough. Let me show you those whose job is really tough.




You are spoiled babies who stand around and have staff squirt GatorAid in your mouths, sit in front of misting cooling fans when it’s warm, and sit on heated benches when it's cold. That’s not “tough” that's pampered.

You think that you deserve to be paid excessively high salaries, because you play a “dangerous" game where you can incur career ending injuries. Let me show you career ending injuries!



You think you that you deserve immediate medical attention and the best medical facilities and doctors when injured. Let me show you what it’s like for those who really need and deserve medical attention.



You think you have the right to disrespect the flag of the United States, the one our veterans fought for, risked limbs and mental stability to defend, in many cases died for. Let me show you what our flag means to them, their families, and their friends.






You believe you are our heroes, when in reality you are nothing but overpaid (and cowardly ) entertainers, who exist solely for our enjoyment! Well, your current antics are neither entertaining nor enjoyable, but rather a disgrace to this country, its citizens, all our veterans and their families, and the sacrifices they have made to ensure this country remains free. You choose to openly disgrace this country in the eyes of the rest of the world, yet with all your money, still choose to live here rather than in any other country. People with even the slightest amount of “Class” will stand and respect our flag. Where does that put you? You want to see heroes? Here are this countries heroes!






You can protest policies, the current government, or anything else you choose, that is your right. But when you “protest” our flag and anthem, you are insulting the nation we all live in and love, and all those who have served, been injured, or died to keep it free. There is nothing you can do or say that can make your actions anything more than the arrogance of classless people, who care about themselves more than our country or the freedoms for which our veterans and their families have sacrificed so much, to ensure you have the “right” to speak freely. Our country is far from perfect, but if you can point to any other country where your freedom and opportunities are better than they are here, then you just might want to go there and show respect for their flag!

If you respect America and all those who have sacrificed so much to keep her free, please forward this to your friends and relatives. Eventually, it should end up in the mailboxes of those who choose to disrespect our country, its service members, our veterans, their families, and all of us who appreciate the freedoms America represents.

My sincere thanks to Kevin for bringing this to my attention and let me only add this: God bless these heroes above, their families and loved ones, and all those who serve in our military and defend our way of life against the vile slime that wish to overthrow the good that this country has wrought.

..and God damn to hell the tutu-wearing NFL kneebenders!

October 15, 2017

Look Up Perve in the Dictionary

..and you will see a picture of Harvey Weinstein. What I am wondering is why all of the Hollywood Hotties would cozy up to this fat jew who never shaved? Did he have an enormous dick?











Maybe there is something to this "casting couch" thing in Hollywood.

Obligatory Sunday Morning Post

Space filler here just to let folks know I made my escape from The Paramecium and, well, Papillon said it best whilst floating away on the raft of coconut husks.


Now I have address the massive task of getting things in order after a career of IT work. I started on that last Thursday with my son, the U. S. Marine soon-to-be-USAF who departs next week for a two-week introductory course for prior service members at Lackland AFB in San Antonio. There he re-learns to salute, then an introductory EOD (Explosive Ordnance Disposal) course at Shepard AFB in Wichita Falls where he learns to cut the blue wire, and finally his primary EOD training of 42 weeks at Eglin AFB in Florida where learns *why* he has to cut the blue wire.

Anyway, he qualified and re-qualified as "expert" several times in the USMC and was kind enough to help me zero my newly acquired Savage Model 10 with the Primary Arms FFP 4-14x44 FFP scope. I would have been lost without him, believe me. At 100 yards, neither one of us cut paper with the first few rounds until Sho got the rifle back on paper and, eventually, zeroed. Here is the range we shot at; Angeles just a shade North of Los Angeles. (Note: stock You Tube video. Not us.)


Then, with the gentle yet insistent prodding from him, I worked up the nerve to try the metal targets 200, then 300 yards, then 400 yards. With about an hour and two line breaks to go, he took a crack at 600 yards and was successful. After nagging me, I took a crack and -- after properly understanding the Primary Arms ACSS HUD reticle -- and was able to ring up one of the bigger square steel targets at that distance.

It was like a drug as we blazed away with the remaining rounds we had. It got so that even 400 yards seemed mundane and repetitive. I was satisfied I could do 600 yards consistently. So, I do not know whether i will push out to 1,000 yards as that will necessitate further tuning of my dubious skills and a serious road trip to a range of suitable distance. But a lot of happy tasks will serve to occupy my time, namely working up a decent load for the rifle, consistently working on sub-MOA groups at 100 yards, and doing this with windage considerations dialed in. (It was dead calm at Angeles that day.)

But all this said, I am grateful to my son and realize that there will be one more reason that I shall miss him as he starts his Air Force career.

A few items collected from various blogs that I found humorous.